Cho Aniki: Otoko no Tamafuda - Wonderswan (2000)

Choaniki: Otoko no Tamafuda

Choaniki: Otoko no Tamafuda

Choaniki: Otoko no Tamafuda

Choaniki makes its first handheld appearance in Otoko no Tamafuda (also known as "Otoko no Konsatsu", I'm not sure of the proper pronunciation), an RPG for the Wonderswan. The title sorta translates to "Man's Tamafuda", which I think is a weird made up word. "Tamafuda", which is presumably a combination of the word "tamashii" (soul) and "hanafuda" (a Japanese card game.) Which almost makes sense, given that all of the battles are card-based. I have absolutely no idea how the battle system works or even remotely how to play the game - seemingly, you draw cards, use them to counteract your opponent, and hopefully attack them. There are several protagonists to choose from, including Idaten, Benten, Adon, Samson, Yaemon (that train-with-a-face), Hikaru 17 (a new character), as well as Sabu and Adam. The game seems to take place in outerspace, and you wander the galaxy in search of foes. Naturally, the trademark sense of humor is all over the place - this is only game I've ever known where you can prance into bathrooms and talk to the people whilst they are using the urinals. Also particularly amusing is a menu option labeled "Feelings *heart*" where your characters will ramble about nonsense, like how much they want to see a Choaniki anime or their opinions on bikini briefs.

Choaniki: Otoko no Tamafuda Choaniki: Otoko no Tamafuda

Cho Aniki: Seinaru Protein Densetsu - Playstation 2 (2003)

Choaniki: Seinaru Protein Densetsu

Choaniki: Seinaru Protein Densetsu

Choaniki: Seinaru Protein Densetsu

Masaya packed up its bags during the 32-bit era, so "The Legend of Holy Protein" was made by X-nauts, a team of former Masaya members, in collaboration with shoot-em-up development team Psikyo. If you've played any of their other titles like Sengoku Ace, you can expect the similar competant, yet somewhat unremarkable gameplay. Still, after the disaster of the Playstation/Saturn game, it's nice to have a title that's at least somewhat enjoyable. There's some sort of plot that revolves around the Holy Protein, who tell our favorite bodybuilders about some magical item that will stregthen their muscles even more. You actually control the Protein, which is floating glob of some kind - Adon and Samson still float by as your bodyguards, and this time you can even pick from a variety of formations to defend yourself with. Additionally, by rotating the right analog stick, your characters will dance and slowly build up an attack meter that allows them to shoot the ultimate weapon: The Men's Beam. The graphics are completely terrible, although I wouldn't doubt that the totally amateurish graphics may be intentional. The music is somewhat dull compared to previous games, and the excessive sound effects are quite annoying. The early stages lack the imaginative craziness we've come to expect from the series, but it picks up as you get further. This time around you'll find a Mona Lisa that fires lasers out of its eyes, a statue that pisses lava, a tribute (??) to Alice in Wonderland in form of an agitated crossdresser, and an incredibly ugly nekomimi (cat ears) maid. The most amusing parts are the insanely silly paintings inbetween levels, and the gloriously silly intro, which is animated with the same professionalism as Aqua Teen Hunger Force and features a rocking song about "pumping it up". While I'd venture it's not as wacky as Ai Cho Aniki, it's probably the most well-balanced of the series. MP3s Intro

Choaniki: Seinaru Protein Densetsu Choaniki: Seinaru Protein Densetsu

Screenshots

Rei Cho Aniki - PSP (2009)

Rei Cho Aniki

Rei Cho Aniki

Rei Cho Aniki

Not content to let the Cho Aniki series die off, a company called Gung Ho Works got the rights from NCS/Masaya and created Rei Cho Aniki (which translates to "Zero Cho Aniki") for the Playstation Portable. Some places have termed this as a remake, but that's not entirely true. But it's also not a completely new game either - it seems like more of a tribute to the series as a whole. Although each of the five stages are technically "new", they take themes and many of the enemies and bosses from previous games. Although this was probably done for the nostalgia factor, or just to introduce new games to how strange the Cho Aniki games are, it feels awfully uninspired. The point of the Cho Aniki games is to see how much progressively weirder they get - why bother if you've seen most of it before? And the new stuff really isn't all that interesting either. An underwater skeleton pirate? A flower with a face? We've seen weirder. The graphics aren't anything special, but they're also a step up from the cheapness of the PS2 game. The music faithfully captures the spirits of the older games, at least. You once again play as Idaten and Benten, like the original, although each have different option types - Idaten has Adon and Samson, while Benten has two creepy angels called Mika and Eru (combined together, they're supposed to spell "Michael".) There's also a third unlockable character, an elephant man named Shouten. Each characters has their standard rapid fire weapon, as well as a limited supply of bombs. The Mens Beam from some of the other games returns too. Fallen enemies will drop little colored muscle men, which adds to your points, which reaches into the trillions. One of the biggest problems is that the enemies simply take too many hits, especially with the weakest weapons. It's acceptable on Easy Mode, but that only lets you play the first three stages. The levels themselves wander between being poorly designed, flooding the screen with nearly unavoidable bullets (make sure to figure out where your hit box is!) or simply being boring. Overall, it's not even up to the level of the first Cho Aniki game, which is the one it seems to most closely want to emulate. It's a better PSP shooter than, say, Sengoku Cannon, but it's still very mediocre.

Rei Cho Aniki Rei Cho Aniki Rei Cho Aniki Rei Cho Aniki Rei Cho Aniki

Related Games - Wings of War / Gynoug - Genesis

While there's nothing out there quite like Cho Aniki, the closest is Gynoug, a Genesis shooter also made by Masaya. Known as Wings of War in America, there are a lot of graphical similarities to the first PC Engine Choaniki games, including the bizarre disposition of shoving human facial features on machinery. Which makes sense - the same graphic designer worked on both titles, although Gynoug is somewhat more gruesome. It's a slightly better game too, with some rather impressive effects for Sega's 16-bit workhouse, although the lack of decent music does hurt it a little bit.

Wings of Wor

Related Games: Pazunin: Uminin no Puzzle de Nimu - Gameboy Advance (2003)

Gem Smashers is a fairly innocuous Gameboy Advance puzzle game developed by Frame Studios Interactive and published by budget house Metro3D. What does this have to do with Choaniki? Well, when it was released in Japan, the developers changed the little gem guys into colored variations on Uminin, that strange little man with the weird face that pops as a mascot character. How incredibly bizarre.

Pazunin

Cameos: Langrisser

Masaya also found another way to showcase the heroes of Cho Aniki by slipping them into their strategy-RPG series Langrisser (which only saw one release in the states with the first game, retitled Warsong.) A hidden level in 1994's Langrisser II for the Mega Drive leads to the Muscle Shrine, where your party must take on Adon, Samson, and Varan and other Aniki body-builders as bosses. The dialogue here is absurd as all the male characters give their attempts at posing and showing off while doing battle (much to the dismay of the female party members.) A victory here nets you the Aniki summon, which is the strongest in the game. This hidden level featuring the "brothers" also made it into Langrisser II remake for the PSX, as well as the SNES port of the game, Der Langrisser.

Langrisser II

Okay, maybe I was lying just a little bit when I said Cho Aniki wasn't gay. A lot of the humor does stem from a certain muscular duo who prance around, firing off their man beams. But it's more than just the gayness really - the wonder of Cho Aniki is that they are cultural showpieces for just how messed up Japanese video game releases can be. At one point you also wonder who greenlights these things and why these people were given not only creative control, but the cashflow to create whatever madness they please. Thanks goes to Robert Greene for the info, write-up and pictures about the Cho Aniki cameo in Langrisser. Links: I-Mockery: Sexual Moments in Video Game History Another look at most of the series. Global A Entertainment The official page of the PS2 game. Encyclopedia Obscura - Choaniki A look at the fighting game. Lots of character sprites. PC Engine Review - Ai Choaniki An excellent review of the second PC Engine game. Universo PC Engine - Choaniki A decent review of the first PC Engine game.

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